Skinny urge

Sometimes I get what I call a skinny urge.  Unfortunately it does not happen often enough or last long enough.  But every once in a while I get an undeniable feeling of being sick of being fat.  Sick of being overweight.  I am on the taller side for a female, 5'7", and carry my weight well, but still, I have about 80 pounds I need to lose.  I have started and stopped so many diets in the last few years that I don't even tell friends anymore when I am going to start one.  I have no faith in myself that it will last.

That isn't to say that I have never been successful.  In 2003 I lost a lot of weight.  Then I gained it back.  Again, in 2005 I lost a lot of weight, getting down to about 155 before I got pregnant with Jim.  That is the last time I have been that low.  Both times I did it with the low carb diet.  I know it is successful, I know I could do it again.  However, the last few times I have tried it I have found myself getting very bored.  I only lasted a week, ONCE.  I don't know what I want to do to lose weight.  I tried Weight Watchers and was successful for a couple of weeks.  Tried counting calories and was successful while I did it.  It seems everything is successful, but finding something I don't get bored on isn't.

Not only is boredom an issue with me, but so is finding and keeping the motivation.  A house with five kids is very stressful.  I have a hard time staying motivated when I am so stressed that I just eat.  I never feel better afterwards, I just do it.

I need to do something.  Drink my water.  Watch what I eat.  Throw out the ice cream.  I need to WANT to be skinny more than I want that ice cream. And when I do feel that way I need it to last.